required dream

k, have i told you how i have to keep this journal thing for fiction writing? and so i'm just going to print out my blog entries and fulfill that requirement. sounds great, huh? just write what i'd be writing normally and turn it in for credit? problem: i have a few assigned writing tasks. there's a daydream one. this is that.
so i'm falling asleep the other night- have i told you this? and i'm just thinking or planning or whatever, and i imagine being in mairee's house in bridgeport. we're chatting, she's standing in her kitchen, on the raised platform. she's doing something with her hands, kneeding bread dough or washing dishes. i'm on the floor across the counter from her, playing with something on the edge- the liebkuchen tin or the vegetable brush. and look up at her, so much taller than me, and she smiles down at me, her kind, knowing smile, and all of a sudden, it hits me. this isn't real. mairee doesn't live there, anymore. no one i know does. she's in baltimore. she's married. this specific comfort? non-existant. i feel such an ache for place and time. it was a familar ache, but i usally only feel this way when i dream about germany, or my mom's old house.

then there's a night dream one. this is that:
i drempt i was in germany. i had just gotten there, and i was in this garden apartment, in the kitchen with meike. i think i was living there, cause it was "my" apartment we were in. i was making plans for my time with her. we stood by the stove, drinking tea. we talked about her latest email to me. it was a long list, a very laura-like list. one of the items was erin mckeown's husband. i was very dissapointed. or maybe it was sara ryan? anyway, we were getting ready for bed, but of course didn't want to sleep- we were too excited to see each other. then we were in this church with birgit, studying these books on mideval times. was in germany doing research for a show, perhaps? the english version of the book didn't have the tables labled. we found other problems with the translation. after the head guy, the pope or tour guide or whatever was done talking, another congregation member was friendly to me in german. i smiled and nodded until i figured out that danke shön was the right thing to say. on the way home it was dark, and meike had this little girl, about 6 or 7. she had bare feet. she spoke english. we were walking ahead of meike and i was holding her hand. she had to go potty. we came to the altstadt, ,and i'm like, look, there's a klo. but you need tokens for it. bus some guy racing on the straßenbahn (which was an el car, though it was on the tracks in the street) gave us 2- they were huge, about 6 inches across. they didn't work on the klo i picked, they just fell right through the slits. but meike caught up by then and helped us pick one they did work in.