sex and prudes

There are so many little bits of stories i want to bring together here- i hope i can make this coheisive. Last night i said there were so many interesting articles in the utne reader, and the one i read this morning is no exception- it's about teens taking sex ed into their own hands, and some students protested CPS and wrote letters and shit and actually got comprehensive sex education here in chicago. What a concept- sex ed is so wierd because while teens are pilable, stupid, and hormone filled, they are still pretty close to being fully adult human beings. it's not like abortion, where it's easy to talk about this human/fetus/baby/fleshblob. like, did anyone ever think to ask the actual teens involved in having too much sex to early what teaching would be most helpful for them?

I'm trying to think back to my sex ed classes, and i remember them as very comprehensive. i mean, they were certainly hetrosexual focused, very pro-abstinence, pro-marriage, but i remember being glad at the time to be getting all that information about stds and birth control. And i certainly did get good information at home- my mom's calling in life was to give people depoprovera shots. i imagined her going to work and roaming the streets of reading with her syringe, talking up people in spanish so she could stab them. so she provded me with good information in a "women need to know this" sort of way, like the persuit of knowledge is always a good thing, and that way she could suspend her disbelief that it would ever be knowledge i would need to USE, that i could in any way become a woman or a sexual being.

Jump forward to present day: at the beach when we were taking photos on the lifeguard chair my cousin louise and her boyfriend started necking up there, and someone yelled "get a room!" and my aunt (her mother) yelled, "yeah- get a room! - but not in my house!!" and that got my mom going on one of her favorite rants, which she gave to another cousin. "there are some things children need to lie about. children have a RESPONSIBILITY to lie to their parents. Parents don't want to know these things about their children!" and so forth.

i went to the doctor on thursday and mentioned it to mom while we were chatting. i said i was there for my pap and std testing, and she was all taken aback. i explained that i thought it was a good idea to get tested when one gets a new girlfriend, and she was all, well, your risks aren't that high, and i almost said, what, compared with being a gay male bottom? but i decided that was inappropriate to say to one's mother, so instead i said, "i think it's just something that a good citizen just does regularly, like voting or something." and that made her laugh.

two other stories that tie in here: talked to g last night about her upcoming wedding, and i mentioned healthcare, and she talked about how tough she's having it, because she doesnt' have health insurance either, and she wants to get on the pill before the wedding. she's having a hard time finding a good clinic in san francisco, but she says she can't go to planned parenthood becuase it would be so upsetting to both her parents and her fiances. it would be all this lying and sneaking and she doesn't want her healthcare to be like that. i COULD NOT COMPREHEND this. we avoided it after that, actually because it's so touchy. like, she's who they're MADE for. women who want to be responsible and make choices about their family but don't have a lot of financial structure to do it with. they are NOT baby killers! still, who am i to judge. straight sex is so complicated- it's hard for me to comprehend the connection that sex leads to babies.

and of course, while in grand rapids lisa! and i will be staying in separate rooms, which of course is fine becuase i'm all about being respectful of one's parents, but on the other hand is illogical and frustrating not becuase i won't be able to go 36 hrs without having hot hot sex with lisa!, but because it gets FUCKING COLD in michigan at night, and if we were hiking on mt everest we would certainly share a sleeping bag to preserve body heat.

but really, REGARDLESS of whatever title or subject this entry was about, i would need to bring it back there, because I AM SO EXCITED! for my extra little vacation, my last trip of the summer. sure, there's gonna be fall and g's wedding and all that, but this is riding a train! with lisa! and a last chance to wear my handknit bikini! and ah, i'm planning on having the lovliest time.



rafael was in town last night, and ch and i went out for sushi with him at his fave sushi place. it was so much cheaper than my local sushi place, and oh so yummy, i stuffed myself until my stomach was distented. however, i had to climb through the cubs fans to get there. i don't care about baseball in the least, but i'll always choose sox over cubs (this is something one must do, living in chicago) because i was a south sider for such a long time, and feel almost defected living on the north side, and i have such exposure to cubs fans, and they are not fun. i don't want to be in any way associated with them as a group.

so I work hard not to do too much D vs. Lisa! comparison. And they are oh so very different. but something D did often was dream of me pregnant. and last night Lisa! had a dream where she was pregnant- under circumstances which only make sense in a dream- and she was gonna get an abortion, but i said we should keep it. ! it got worse, but luckily lisa! assured me i was acting completely out of character in the dream.

on clothing: lisa! and i have reached the point in our relationship where each other's clothing ends up in each other's laundry basket. i wore one of her tshirts to work today- actually, the one that used to be her favourite, because it's in just about every pic on her myspace. sure, it was a cuddly gf thing to do and made me think of her all day etc, but actually the strongest connection for me was that german nostalgia- how i travel through europe, bringing american food instead of clothing in my suitcase, and wearing my german friends' clothes. i do love wearing other people's clothing- of course, because i love variety, and then also because of my degree and all, it's like wearing a costume for me, dressing up as someone else- i am that much closer to being a nuerenbergian by wearing ruth's clothes.
also on clothing, i am paralized over packing for this weekend. i want to pack lightly, but i want to wear my hippest duds, but i want to be fully prepared for all that michigan weather has to offer, but i don't want to seem like i'm trying too hard, but i do want to try hard, but it all has to fit some place very small. i've decided to wear my jeans on the train and i've picked out two quality tops to wear coming and going, but saturday, over my handknit bikini? the turquoise american apparel skirt with the windy city rollers tank? or the tiedyed tshirt skirt with the dykes in the city tank? immobilized, i tell you.

i've been eating an uncanny amount of chocolate recently. it's expensive stuff. so i decided to buy it at the grocery store, where it's cheaper, but i'm STILL trying to boycott hershey and their fucking vegetable oil and mexican factories, and so in a price per oz comparison, well, what i'm trying to say is i spent $9 on chocolate, and that seems embarrassingly high, but i have this brick of 45oz. of m&ms in my freezer.

Continue to be slow at work, but i've been keeping up with the blogs and so know about Del Martin and Sarah Palin. (and have shared feministing articles about them! and other interesting things! so you should get on google reader and share with me too! because i love to share!) I also chatted with liz briefly today, who gave me the delightful list of what she looks for in girls: good grammar, well-read, funny, and looks good in hats. i found it to be the perfect list (other than being an even number of items, which she may fix by adding mentally healthy to it) on so many levels- personal, yet generic enough to fit mulitiple different people, specific things that are important to her yet general enough to be indications of other things. it made my random "no cooking bacon or watching football or tickling me on the sides of my waist" requirements seem petty and trite.

It's been the sort of day when i want to blog about everything, but the difference is today i'm actually getting the oppertunity to do so. finished up this month's wired over dinner (my last tamarind tree meal! boo hoo! if anyone knows of any edible instant indian meals PLEASE let me know. email, comment, call, whatever. i'm DESPERATE. i miss tamarind tree meals SO MUCH. i feel like i can't even experiment anymore, because every single other one i've tried has been disgustingly HORRIBLE.) and so started the utne reader, and i want to blog about EVERY SINGLE ITEM on, like, the first six pages. so this, obviously, will have to be saved for yet another post.


It's Sad

that i only copy and paste things these days and never actually write anything interesting. but, well, lisa!, and lack of sleep, and bags, and working for bag lady and curtains r us, and adding more and more things to my google reader. i've discovered i've become an internet consumer instead of an internet sharer. I love reading all those blogs, and spend so much time doing it. but actually writing on my own blog? i have nothing interesting to say, it seems. certainly nothing interesting enough to justify breaking the long silence. (this post isn't interesting enough either, but now that the silence is broken, maybe i'll type more.) But things are SO SLOW at the flowershop these days (and that is ineffably sad too) that i've been updating facebook at work, and wow, the response is very gratifying! i used to get a comment about every other blog post, and they're so few and far between these days (granted, i know that's my own fault and if i wrote often enough and interesting enough the comments would come on their own) that i have a hard time remembering that i'm just not posting into the void, that people actually care and are sad when i don't tell them about the amazing corn chowder with tomatoes and pesto and oregano fennel risotto and nectarine sorbet that i made for lisa for dinner on saturday, or about chris's luao birthday party in the alley between buildings that was so over-leied it looked like a cute cafe, and luckily all the stuffed parrots had their batteries removed so they didn't talk to us, or about things you're not really interested in, like finding a pattern for my next sweater or trying to suppress my sock knitting urge.

more of that, if i think about it. i promise. i mean the first stuff in the list, not the knitting, of course, but the things before it, because knitting isn't interesting to anyone but me, really.

prime regifting opertunity

In the work email box this morning:

"Good afternoon,

As you should have noted in our July newsletter you had the correct answer for our June Brain Teaser contest. Your limited edition Sears Tower coffee book will be delivered to you this afternoon..

Congratulations, Caitlin"


no where else on the internet

can you find the lyrics to matson jones "new york city fuck off" i did all sorts of google searches for the matson jones new york city fuck off lyrics and there is NOTHING. so now, longing to be the top hit for SOMETHING, i present you with my dictation, for lisa!, since she never pays any fucking attion to any lyrics ever.

I'm sick of electronic fingers
and voices through recievers
give me hands

I'm sick of neurotic picture makers
and heady confrontation
give me heart
oh, wah oh, wah oh.

I'm through with electronic letters
and too many vices
give me help

I'm through with lovely picture makers
and new york city fuck off
oh, wah oh, wah oh.

run run run run run that down
run run run run run that town
run run run run run me down
run run run run run me down.

I'm over cigarettes [until?] their filters
and cold that hurts my fingers
give me gloves

I'm over lonely picture makers
who scatter their hearts
give me guts oh, wah oh, wah oh.

I'm through with lonely conversations
and heartfelt contradictions
give me grace

i'm through with tragic picture makers
and optimistic suckers fuck off oh, wah oh, wah oh.

run run run run run me down...

I'm sick of electronic fingers
and voices through recievers
give me hands

I'm sick of neurotic picture makers
and heady confrontation
give me heart
oh, wah oh, wah oh.

I'm over cigarettes [unto?] their filters
and cold that hurts my fingers
give me gloves

I'm over lonely picture makers
who scatter their hearts
give me some fucking guts oh, wah oh, wah oh.

am i crazy?

...or does gabrielle's fiance look quite a bit like miguel?

back me up on this, people! no one in the world knows them both!


more work!

curtains r us called me up! i'm going to work there next week. sorry baby preview. my life is looking so good right now- there's work everywhere! on top of everything else. i walk through the city streets with my shuffle playing the soundtrack of my life, and it's so cinematic and marvelous i can't stand it- i need to jump or dance or sing or something, because the joy my life brings me is too big to contain.


back from the dead

Busy weekend- lisa! and i went to a advertising party at the top of the W hotel friday night, then saturday i had to go with ch to deliver all those corsages. i made good progress on the bowling ball bags and cooked up last week's FABULOUS vegetables. a tomato mozzarella basil salad (everything from MY garden except the mozarella) a bermuda salad with the green beans, and pesto rotini. Lisa! and i watched shortbus saturday night, and sunday we spent all day at market days. see? no time to blog in there!

Susan, who had a dress i cut a pattern from and copied, called me up with some mending and other projects. so i have MORE sewing! horray! this makes me so happy. but, there's always that stress. i need to actually DO the sewing now that i have it if i want to get paid!

finished my ziggy socks! pictures are on flickr, as well as beach pics, pics of the bikini, and ch's casa bonita themed birthday party!

finally [insert usuaal apology and promise to blog more here]



Just got home from work. Hello holiday! there's a big event this weekend that needs 20 wrapped boquets of a dozen roses each. and 130 two-rose wrist corsages. that's SO Much work. Ch and i worked for hours today, and we're just past half way with the corsages. the rest of them, and the boquets need to be finished tomorrow.

oh, and did i mention the 80 balloon order? have you seen the size of the shop? 80 balloons take up a lot of space.

if you'll excuse me, i'm going to do my holiday hand regiment now. sorry bag lady. this was unexpected.


espirit de escalier

so stacy's at the local pagan bookstore chatting with the clerk. she's making small talk and the clerk mentions his republican boyfriend. stacy says "oh, i'm sorry" and the woman behind her in line is SO offended, saying "I'm a republican and my son is a soldier in Iraq!" i don't know what stacy said at the time, but a great comeeback would be, "oh, so you're thinking the witches will bring your son home before george w bush will?"


me and the vegan anarchist second cousin once removed

Originally uploaded by nancykatzen
Back from the beach! had a (almost completely) delightful time, and more marvelous ensued with krista and sarah in philly. now i'm home and have SO MUCH WORK. unpacking, laundry, bags, etc. will try and get back in the blogging habit!