inexplicably

having a sad night. i think i need to go to bed- i haven't been getting nearly enough sleep. i'm just feeling a little dark and dismal. ok, i'm actually feeling discontent with my life in general. and listening to inappropriate music that just makes me feel worse.

"and all this time, i felt just fine, i held so many people in my suitcase heart. i had to let the whole thing go i was taken by the wind and snow and i still didn't know that i was waiting..."

i guess i don't even know what my girl on a slow pony home is. but i guess if i did know that i'd know what i was waiting for.

"watcha doing with the suitcase? trying to hit the ground with both feet running. aren't you tripping on your shoelace? stealing away on a sunny day... aren't you ashamed at all?"

at least i have a metaphor i'm enjoying.

"my heart is on the baggage rack, it's heavy as can be. i wish that i could find someone to carry it for me. to pay it some attention and to handle it with care, for it has been dropped and is in need of some repair."

i'll do my best to blog again in the morning, when things look better. the trouble is, when things look better i tend to get stuff done, it's when things don't look good that i wallow.