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it's been a day full of annoyances. handed in both my papers. only have 10 more lectures for fashion history to sit through. really, it's way too long. i don't know if i could make it. if ms. b. a. church (feel free to exploit as much as you want, evil lurkers, she deserves it) was at all a loveable, interesting or redeamable person it would be one thing. if she was knowlagable about her subject, that would be another. if she gave interesting lectures, sure. if she always provided correct information, perhaps i'd be able to stand it! but no, none of these things happen in her class. i do hope the fashion department has evaluations. cause i want someone in the college hierarchy to hear my pain. and frances has thrown the costume shop into a rukus this morning, so by the time i got there everyone was stressed out and dying to go home. as for comments. well, as soon as i walk in the front door i got some nasty ones. micho looked at me with his disparaging "who do you think you are? certainly not charles!" dismissive glare. then hissed, meowed, and started to pant. like the mere sight of me was giving him an allergic reaction, or a panic attack. but then i thought he was looking for petting, so i started to brush him, and he was purring, but then he got angry, and bit me, and there's blood. i take it all very personally. i think micho's a misogynist. so this glum day is what makes it so delightful that i've gotten some comments! maya's blog is like this big public forum, with all sorts of people commenting every day. it's so validating, to hear that people are actually reading, and want to make this a little community rather than a crazy person's ranting and raving. and not only is it my friends, who have to love me, but someone intirely new to my little world! welcome, jamie! amy doesn't like to post comments, but she emailed me hers:
"as for gabrielle, i think a simple "let's agree to disagree" is appropriate? or is that too flip? obviously "your views are bullshit" isn't quite appropriate. do you have tony and peggy campolo's article or did i lose it forever? that sure changed my worldview. i'm sure you can find articles on pro-homosex christians. if not, i'll ask around for you." ¶what did i actually do? well, i just wrote back to g that wends is fine to hang out, and i'm not prepared to answer right away and i think she knows what i think anyway. i can't really give into the agree to disagree, beacause i want to change her and make her have a more worldly and loving opinion. i was pretty riled up, and wasn't sure what to do with it, so i ended up comming out to my mom. ! yep. she was on im, and i was buying my ticket to go there for thanksgiving, so we were talking anyway. she said exactly what allie said she would, "i just want you to be happy." which i think is such a funny way of putting it. at this point, what would make me happy? i am such a people pleaser, i want my grandparents and society to be pleased, if a little in awe, of my life. no one wants their friends to think they're living sinful disgusting lives. is love worth it? i think happiness is gonna be pretty difficult to accomplish.